Sexual Assault

       Today we did an activity called ‘Cultural Myths That Support Sexual Assault’. The worksheet listed statements about sexual assault and we had to determine truth from myth. When I read them through, it was clear to me what the actual correct answers would be, however it got me thinking about how many false statements are opinions held by people around me, some of which I know. It is obvious to me that a woman wearing suggestive clothing is not asking for any kind of trouble, but I have heard friends of mine holler at a girl dressed in sexy clothes, and justify it to me as “if she didn’t want the attention, she wouldn’t have dressed that way”. My friends may not be sexually assaulting anyone with these beliefs, but it shows that these beliefs do exist, and it is scary to think that there are people willing to take the situation to the next level under the same justification.

     On the other hand, a couple of the statements made suggestions about women lying about being raped. Again, I know that sexual assault is something that happens, and something that happens much too often. However there are women who are willing to lie about being sexually assaulted for whatever benefit they see for themselves.
     The following video describes a few different situations in which sexual assault occurs. I find it shocking that so many cases go unreported, and I think that awareness needs to be raised to show people that they are not alone in their situation and they have to power to seek justice for what has happened to them.

Sexual Dysfunction

   

     When I personally think of sexual dysfunction, I think of the commercials on the television of older couples that do not really say much, but seem to have a pill that has made them very happy such as those in the video above. Of course I have always known that there is more to it than that, but today’s class opened my eyes. I have always thought that sexual dysfunction is something that affects males and males alone, but it seems that most types can affect both males and females. I also thought that age was the biggest factor that caused it, or perhaps alcohol in some situations, but it seems that the problem can be in your head just as much as biological or chemical issues in your body. The different types are probably what shocked me the most. It seems unreal how unknown some of these disorders are. I wonder about people who are experiencing some of these and have not done anything about it simply because they do not understand what is going on or what they can do to help themselves. I feel much better now being educated on the subject so that I can help a friend through if they approach me with an issue and calm their fears. 

The End of Men

     Recently we have watched two documentaries in class. The first was called The F-word: Who Wants to be a Feminist, and it talked about the reluctance of many modern women to call themselves feminists. The second was called The End of Men, which discussed the trials that the men go through in our society and brought attention to an often ignored subject. I personally preferred The End of Men. I think that this is because as a woman, it is interesting to learn about what men are experiencing today. I think that the feminist movements not only gave women a voice that they had not had before, but also took man’s voice away. I hope that now, in a society that women are able to enjoy the same privileges as men, we can come back together and have true equality without bitterness or jealousy on either side.

http://www.calgaryunderground.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/Equality-300x300.jpg

Masturbation

     On Thursday we did an activity called ‘Thinking about the Logic of Cultural Taboos Against Masturbation’. We read a short paragraph and were ask of our opinions. I feel as though many of the “widely held cultural beliefs” about masturbation are absolutely prehistoric and ridiculous. The difference between solitary sexual behaviour and sexual behaviour with a partner hardly exists in today’s society. Sexual behaviour is no longer believed to be only for reproduction, so what is the problem with masturbation? For those who personally believe in only engaging in sexual behavior for the purpose of reproduction, I can see a small argument against masturbation. However I see no reason for those people to have any say or opinion towards others who do not share these beliefs. 

Abortion

     Abortion is a widely controversial issue today in our society. It is one that I am very cautious to take a firm position on, not because I do not have an opinion, but because I am aware that there are many positions to take and a lot of different reasoning behind each position. With the information I have learned about abortion, I personally believe that it is a matter that should be between the parents of the pregnancy. Many people say it is up to the mother, but I think the father has a very important say in what goes on as well. This is not to say that the father can veto the mother’s opinion, but it is a discussion that needs to be had between the parents before a decision is made. With that said, I am aware that the father will not always be involved with the decision making process, and even then the woman’s life can potentially change a lot more from a pregnancy than her partner’s. If a woman has educated herself with all of her options and made the decision to abort her pregnancy, I do not think that there is anyone who should be able to tell her that she has to go through with the pregnancy. One can argue that the mother should not be able to decide the fate of another person, but I think that if she is truly prepared to go through with an abortion, it would be a crime to allow that child to come into a world in which it is considered a burden.

http://webpage.pace.edu/nreagin/tempmotherhood/fall2003/8/cartoon.jpg

Romeo and Juliet

http://nathensmiraculousescape.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/lovetri.jpg

     On Thursday we watched excerpts from the 1996 film Romeo and Juliet. When I look at the film critically, I feel as though Sternberg’s Model of Love would describe the love of Romeo and Juliet as fatuous love. The three factors that the model takes into account are intimacy, passion, and commitment. In order for consummate love to exist, all three factors must come into play. In Romeo and Juliet, I think that there is definitely passion between the two. They also show clear commitment to each other by taking their own lives to be together. However, you do not see a lot of intimacy. The young love birds hardly knew each other long enough to ask the other’s favourite colour, let alone have a truly intimate conversation. All that said, I do not think that the label of fatuous love makes their love any less real. What Romeo and Juliet had was enough for them, and had they spent more time together their love surely would have developed. I think that that is very important to remember when discussing Sternberg’s Model of Love. Even if a couple can be placed on the triangle at one moment, their relationship is constantly changing and fluctuation, and no point on the model is necessarily better than another.

Attractiveness from an Evolutionary Perspective

     A continued discussion in class of attraction brought up some interesting points in yesterday's lesson. We talked about attractiveness from an evolutionary perspective and I found it very intriguing. I definitely agree that many features that we find attractive in others may very well stem from early necessities in a mate. Even though strength no longer ensures success in our society, it is still considered to be very attractive in a male. Yet at the same time, I think that attractiveness has developed with the times. Men who are intelligent and/or tech savvy are considered attractive for their ‘provider potential’. I also think that with the evolution of feminism, it has become increasingly attractive for males to take on certain roles that were previously primarily feminine, as well as for females to take on roles that were previously primarily masculine.

Attraction

     Attraction is something that is different for everyone. For lack of a better saying, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. One person could be considered perfectly attractive in every way to someone, while another wouldn’t even take a second glance. For most people, physical beauty is very important in a short term partner, mostly because it has to be. Before you get to know someone emotionally, there has to be something else there to attract you to them. At the risk of sounding arrogant, I do not believe that I am someone who takes physical attractiveness very seriously. I have noticed through my past relationships that propinquity and reciprocity seem to be a great factor in who I have relationships with. Of course I can appreciate an attractive person, but rarely does that draw me to them. I should mention, however, just in case my boyfriend is reading over my shoulder, that I was lucky enough to find someone close to me who is extremely physically attractive!

     For a long term relationship, I do not think that physical attractiveness is really enough. There needs to be shared or similar values and goals, as well as an understanding and healthy compromise where your goals and values do not perfectly match.

     The following video is a humorous take on female attractiveness. It describes the stereotypical female ideal for physical attractiveness. I hope the coarse language isn't too much, I thought it was too funny to pass up having on my blog. Enjoy!

Masculinity vs. Femininity

     The class discussion today focussed on masculinity and femininity. We were asked to select some well-known person as representing the ideal of each femininity and masculinity. As a class, we came up with James Bond, Arnold Schwarzenegger, George Clooney, Brad Pitt, and Will Smith as representatives for masculinity. We chose Jennifer Anniston, Michelle Obama, Betty White, and Marilyn Munroe as representatives for femininity. I really liked that Michelle Obama was considered feminine by my classmates because it seems that only recently women have been praised for being poised, intelligent, and in a position of power. This was the idea of Second Wave Feminism, but I feel as though this ideal was really only a view shared by feminists at the time rather than the general population.

     I found this activity slightly difficult, because although I was aware of the idea of ideal femininity and masculinity that was requested of me, my personal ideals do not really exist for either gender. I feel as though gender is a wide spectrum, where a person, male or female, can sit anywhere along. Neither end is ideal and neither end is flawed. Wherever an individual person sits along this spectrum is their own personal ideal, and it isn’t for any other person to judge what is ideal for another.

The Male and Female Orgasm

     We participated in an activity today where we read a description that someone had made about the human orgasm and we had had to try to decipher whether it was said by a male or a female. While filling out the short worksheet, there were a few that I thought I got right, but for the most part it seemed that all the descriptions could come from a male or a female. I ended up answering five of the eleven correctly, but to be honest I am quite sure that was due to the 50/50 chance I had to get any one of them right. I find it very interesting that the descriptions from males and females are so similar, what with the different anatomy and cycles. It made me slightly question my personal ideas about sex and gender. I have always viewed men and women’s sexual experiences as two very different things. This probably stems from my original sex education, back in grade school when my class was split into girls and boys to learn about sex. The reality is that both sexes experience sex nearly the same way, and I wonder if education should be adjusted accordingly. 

The Vagina Monologues

http://sizedoesntmatter.com/wp-content/uploads/jpg-English-Mon1-635x357.jpg

     Today I class we watched a portion of the play The Vagina Monologues. My personal response to it includes a few mixed feelings. I think that it is great for women to talk frankly about their bodies and their personal experiences. Even in our modern society, it is not very socially acceptable for such topics to be discussed. I don’t see any reason for this because it is something that all women go through and many do not have an outlet to express their concerns or questions because of social expectations on them to deal with it on their own. However, I am not sure if the play directly addressed this issue. The position they took seemed to poke fun at a woman’s desire to share her feelings about her body’s changes. Though it made the play a joy to watch, the outcome was that rather than being taken seriously, women were being ridiculed for sharing. You could see this in the reaction of the audience. The more specific the actress was about her experience, the bigger the laugh received from the audience. I think the main reason for this was the shock factor, because the audience was not accustomed to hearing such things. I think that if the play had approached the subject differently, it could have had really changed the perspective that the audience had on the issue.   

Habermas' Paradigms

     In class today we participated in an activity in which we described a phenomenon within human sexuality according to one of Habermas’ Paradigms. I chose to talk about abortion from the situational interpretive paradigm. I found this activity very useful as a way to deepen my understanding of Habermas’ Paradigms, and I thought I would share my activity on this blog. This isn’t necessarily my own opinion, just an extreme example.

     Abortion should not be an individual choice. A fetus is a person as soon as sperm meets egg. It is unfair for any person to decide for a baby if it should live or die, because it cannot speak for itself. Though it may be difficult for women who become pregnant unexpectedly, they made a choice when they became pregnant that they now have a responsibility to follow through with.  

Introduction

     I am very eagerly looking forward to this class. I think that I am most looking forward to learning about views on topics within human sexuality that I have not yet considered. Though I have a general idea of where I stand on most issues, I am always open to hearing other viewpoints and relating them to my own. I like to be able to take new information and use it to confirm what I agree with, confirm what I disagree with, or even change how I feel about something. I feel as though there are many topics within the discipline of human sexuality that I have opinions on but I don’t necessarily know a lot about. Some of these topics include abortion, same sex marriage, and the general involvement of religion in a person’s sexuality. I also look forward to learning about the integration of human sexuality education in a classroom. It seems as though sexuality is affecting students at a younger and younger age, and as a future elementary teacher I think that this is something that is very important to be educated on.